Wednesday, August 26, 2009

My Mid-life Crisis

I'm finding it strange that those words even apply to me...but I guess at 39 there's no way I can deny that I'm practically MIDDLE-AGED now. So how can it be that I am still trying to decide what to do with my life? Up until now, I haven't exactly been slacking my life away--I've been raising a family, I've worked in several successful jobs, I've served successfully as PTA President and Primary President as well as countless other projects and daily activities--all things I've enjoyed and felt good about doing. But I am feeling more and more, lately, that there is an important, unknown path that I need to take.

I am not sure, but I have been thinking a lot about going back to school--either to become a teacher or a school counselor. Both of these would be a LOT of work and I don't even want to think about the cost (no Pell Grants for post-grad work)--but as I've started my new job at the Intermediate school, I walk down the halls and see the teachers with their classes and I am convinced that I would be happy doing the same thing...or maybe just that I could be doing MORE than what I am now...whatever that might be.

I don't really know why when you reach a certain point in life that you start worrying about fulfillment and unrealized potential, but I guess I'm not above the cliche. It seems to me that I have made so many plans and maybe I'm running out of time. I guess it makes you want to go out and do something crazy...just to know you can.

Anyway, I don't mean to be so maudlin! I'm basically just thinking out loud...wondering what to do...and trying to organize my thoughts. It's so hard to know what the best thing for me and my family might be. I can guarantee that I'll be praying for some insight and guidance with these possible life changing decisions. It's actually kind of exciting to think what might be around the corner...but I guess that's what makes a good midlife crisis, right?


Anonymous said...

Whatever you decide you will be good at it. Counselor sounds like your alley to me. But you would be a good teacher also. The summers off with the girls would be a plus. Love you, Im thinking I need to get something going for after I retire in 5. Love ya all....Mom

Melanie and Curtis said...

Tonya, you would be fabulous at anything..I'm sure that's why the choice of what to do is hard. I've seen you in action as the primary president and totally admire you because of it. You're so organized, thoughtful, and creative. Many lives will be blessed whatever you do. Good luck!

Josie said...

Tonya, I certainly would not call that a mid-life crisis! More like mid-life re-determination. I think it's awesome you even have the desire to go back to school. I am the complete opposite, I can't imagine ever going back! Good luck with whatever you decide!

Joe and Julianne said...

You would make a great school counselor or teacher! BTW when you are having a true mid life crisis I heard you are supposed to go out and buy a fancy sports car and get hair extensions ... maybe we can go shopping together :) You are awesome girl!

Roger said...


Have you thought about being a principal? How about president of the school board?

This I know, that you will be the best at whathever you set your heart on!

Love, Dad